Here we go.. Peter is born

28 Aug

I must be honest now. The reason I’ve decided to start this blog is simple: Motherhood and I had a rough start, I struggled A LOT at first. I was terrified of having Postpartum Depression. It was a never ending loop of shame and fear. I asked for help in all the right places aka Husband, Friends, Family, Nurses, Doctors. And even though everyone told me that what I was feeling was normal (specially due to the fact that Peter and I almost died (more on that later) ) I still felt their words weren’t honest, that they were just being condescending, and that I was  basically loosing my mind. It wasn’t until I talked to another recent new mother that I calmed down, I begun to understand what was going on, that it was normal, and I finally got to make peace with what I was feeling. As soon as I talked to this angel of a mother, I felt better, less scared and most importantly I felt a huge weight being lifted from my shoulders: The weight of motherhood shame.

This person really made a difference, she wasn’t even a close friend, but she was so honest, her words really hit home. She saved my relationship with Peter and for that I’m eternally grateful. You see, I had talked to other new mothers about what I was feeling, I asked about how they bonded with their own babies, their mood, their anxiousness, and this is the answer I got: Loved him/her since the first time I saw them, rainbows and butterflies flew across the room, couldn’t be happier or more secure about this little change in my life. Me?: In my mind I believed I loved him right?, I was sad but not about anything specific, It was a life changing event only I didn’t want my life to change, are you sure he wants to eat again? Oh yeah by the way: I’m a monster, the worst mother in the world, is this how I will feel about motherhood forever? Welcome to the loop of fear and shame. Yet this mom was so honest about her own struggles, she didn’t have to, but she spoke to me for about an hour. She was patient and sweet and she listened and spoke her truth.   She’s the reason I started this blog. I believe in paying it forward. My only hope is that someday a new mother will read this blog, feel identified and most importantly, understood.

This I will promise about my blog: There will be tears, both Happy and Sad and I will be brutally honest about them all. Here’s hoping you stick around!!

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2 Responses to “Here we go.. Peter is born”

  1. mrsmouthyrsmouthy August 31, 2012 at 10:42 AM #

    I am so looking forward to hearing about your struggles and joys through your blog. Your honesty is so refreshing and I imagine this blog will reach so many mothers who have been in the same place. You’re an amazing writer, and it’s been soooooo long since I’ve found another blog I’ve wanted to read.

    • 3rd World Mommy September 3, 2012 at 9:44 AM #

      You made my day, my week, my year!! Thank you so much for your comment. I’ve been reading your blog since I got pregnant (I’m your Colombian follower!!). I was so tired with people taking pregnancy so seriously I googled Funny Pregnancy Blog and found Mrs. Mouthy!!! I can’t tell you how much I enjoy your Blog. You are famous in my house! Best Wishes.

      BTW. Loved the Key Lime Pie story. I told my Husband about it, you know, just to keep him on his toes.

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